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The families of UK citizens held in the United Arab Emirates over allegations that they shared images of the conflict with Iran have voiced frustration at the British government’s failure to help.

Several British citizens are among more than 100 foreign nationals who have been detained under draconian Emirate rules that outlaw publishing or sharing material that could “disturb public security”.

UK government ministers have refused to condemn the arrests, amid claims they are too fearful of offending the Emirates because of their economic clout.

The campaign group Dubai Watch, which is supporting nine British detainees, said their identities could not be revealed for fear of reprisals. But it has shown the Guardian anonymised correspondence from their increasingly anxious families.

A mother whose daughter is being held wrote: “This experience is exhausting, mentally and emotionally.”

She described reading media reports about the continuing conflict in which Iran has retaliated against US and Israelis strikes by firing drones and missiles against its Gulf neighbours, including the UAE.

She said: “I have just read another article, and quite frankly I could do one purely on the inadequacies and sycophantic responses from this [UK] embassy.”

She also expressed increasing fears for her daughter’s safety as attacks continued. The mother said: “I spoke to [my daughter] last night and they are no longer allowed to go outside in the courtyard as it’s now deemed too dangerous to do so. This is an even bigger worry as they are all just sitting ducks.”

Another message from a woman whose husband had been detained under the same law said the case had been “mishandled”. She added: “We are scared because nobody is telling us the truth. Can you please help us.”

Police in Abu Dhabi said those detained had “filmed sites and events and disseminated inaccurate information via social media platforms during the ongoing events, an action that could stir public opinion and spread rumours among community members”.

In a statement, the officials said these “violations” amounted to a “misuse of social media”.

Daisy Cooper, the deputy leader of the Liberal Democrats, confirmed that one of the detainees was a St Albans’ constituent.

She said their family was frustrated by the lack of consular help.

Cooper told the Guardian: “I’m deeply concerned that my constituent has been held with very little contact with their family, with no clear access to legal counsel, and no confirmation that UK consular officials have been permitted to visit them. The family are distressed and desperate for information about their wellbeing.”

Cooper also criticised the UAE’s round-up of anyone it has accused of sharing images of the conflict. She said: “The response from the authorities appears wholly disproportionate given the nature of the allegations.

Cooper added: “I have written to UK ministers asking them to urgently seek clarification from the UAE authorities on the legal basis for my constituent’s detention and to ensure that British embassy officials can visit them as soon as possible to confirm their safety and welfare.”

The Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Office confirmed that five UK nationals were receiving consular assistance in the UAE.

David Haigh, a human rights lawyer and founder of Dubai Watch, said: “There’s an awful lot more than five cases. The embassy is overwhelmed.”

He added: “There hasn’t been any government intervention because it would offend the UAE and they don’t want to do that. Impotent is the best way to describe the response. They’re too scared – it’s all about the money and investment from the UAE.

“If another country had done this there would be very senior level discussions to stop it. The people being detained are not terrorists; they are average holidaymakers who have taken pictures and thought, wrongly obviously, that it would be OK.”

Haigh said: “Lawyers that I trust have told there are about 35 [British citizens] in Dubai and about 40 more in Abu Dhabi and the other Emirates. And that number has gone up, so I would say you’re now looking at around 90.”

The Foreign Office said: “We are providing consular assistance to a small number of British nationals detained in the UAE in connection with this issue, and our ambassador is engaging with the Emirati authorities about their cases.”

Last month, Dubai police confirmed it had arrested 109 individuals of various nationalities who had shared images of war damage in Dubai and elsewhere in the UAE.

The numbers detained are feared to be many more. In Dubai, which was home to more than 200,000 British citizens before the conflict, police send out regular warnings against spreading misinformation and filming war damage.

The force warns: “Photographing or sharing security or critical sites, or reposting unreliable information, may result in legal action and compromise national security and stability.”